Addicted and not seeking help.

Hello lovelies,

Sorry for the delay and any recommendations; college is hard, deadlines loom, and at 24, I feel an existential crisis coming on. Studying English, I've had to read many books in the past few weeks for my assignments, and I thought about writing reviews on those novels; however, they are not engaging in the way that the books I read for fun are. While they share vast knowledge and historical context for the English language, there's no fey Prince, no strong female heroines, no adventure. So today, I thought I would share how I am getting through and reading these novels and finding time to read books I enjoy. I love reading, but there's something about being told to read a book that makes me desperately not want to finish it. I am addicted to reading and books in general.

I usually read paper books. I love the feeling of soft pages pressed against my fingers; I love the weight of a book aching my wrists as I read for hours. I love the smell when you open a book and the smell of ink and the freshly pressed pages hitting your nose. I love older books, dust lingering on them. The pages are crisp and soft all at the same time. The smell of the oils from the fingers before me who traced the words I now devour. It makes reading more exciting and thrilling to know that the story I am reading has graced so many other people. I feel like I'm sharing a world, a secret world that only a reader is allowed into. All these things are amazing however it is not easy carrying around large books everywhere I go. And while I would like to be like Rory Gilmore, I cannot fit a book inside my purse. I am not a tote bag kind of gal; I like a small purse one to fit my phone and a ChapStick and my wallet and nothing more. When in school it's easy to fit one extra book inside of a backpack or stuff it inside a locker. But now that I'm in college and studying online I have nowhere to put books other than my home, while some do leave some in my car, following me from place to place for the most part they sit on my shelves watching me day to day. Another problem I run into is I don't want to buy every book I read. While there are books, I adore and love getting lost in the pages of and reading year after I will say the romance books that I read are not books that I would put on my bookshelf as they are not books, I would ever reread. To me the romance books that I flipped through within a day, and cast aside are enjoyable and excellent reads, but once I know the end of the romance the excitement that comes from starting a love story goes away. So, if I can't buy them, and the library is out of them, what am I to do? How am I supposed to enjoy these books and read them if I cannot get them?

That brings me to my Kindle. I am unequivocally obsessed with my Kindle. Now I have an Amazon Fire tablet with the Kindle app on it. The reason I have this instead of an actual Kindle is because I use it as a laptop, as a source of entertainment for my friend's children with the games that I keep on it. I use it to take photos and send emails, there are really many uses for it. But mostly I use it to read, I have a Kindle Unlimited subscription that I use without fail for five to six books a month. The thing that I love about Kindle Unlimited, is that most of the romance books that I wouldn't want to keep on my shelves I can read for free on my tablet. I also can read them on my phone as the Kindle app can connect on both devices. You may ask well then why don't you just use your phone it seems like everything you would use a phone for you do on the tablet. First, I will say my tablet does not get notifications, and as an easily distracted reader that is a godsend for me. The ability to put my phone aside and just read, is the reason I'm able to finish so many books. Another thing I will say is although I am only 24 it is not easy on my eyes; in fact, I often get headaches when I read on my phone. I like using my Kindle at night or when on long car rides, and I love it for travel. Oftentimes if there is an adventure or fantasy novel I want to read but I'm about to travel or be away from my house for a long time I often will get it on my tablet and buy it later as a physical copy from my library.

The final way I have been able to get through my English courses and read books I'm required to read, as well as read for fun has been audible. I've never been a fan of listening to someone read a book to me, oftentimes I find they speak too slowly, and I find it overwhelming and frustrating. However, this semester I've been taking history and form classes, where I must read Great American novels and literature. While some of the books I've been required to read have enjoyable plots and characters, I am unused to the way people used to write. I'm not talking about old English, as I am a massive fan of Shakespeare. I am explicitly talking about American romanticism writing, where it seems people never heard of a run-on sentence. On top of this, the sentence structure is strange, and the words they use sound like to me at least a fifth grader trying to sound like they know what they're talking about and acting like an adult. It's very hard for me to get through, but listening to it is not so bad. Oftentimes, I found myself this semester listening to my required readings rather than reading them. I find that I'm able to digest the material much faster and with greater understanding than if I had tried to read it myself. I'm not saying the writing is terrible, I'm just saying it's a little dense.

In terms of what form of reading I enjoy most, I still enjoy physical books the most, and the other two are hit-and-miss. I could be handed a physical book and sit down and read it any day, but with an electronic version of a book, sometimes I get distracted, or I'm just not in the mood to read that way. So I still think that physical books are the best, but if you haven't tried one of these other ways, I highly recommend you do. Especially for those of you who are working full-time, have kids, or are in school. Busy lives often stop us from having the time to read and enjoy our hobbies. I think the great thing about technology is that it has opened a whole new world for us and how we can enjoy the things we love, and reading is not excluded from that.

Happy reading.